My new calling

I was released from my callings in Relief Society today and I am now the branch's Primary Music Leader. I will miss the opportunity I had to teach in Relief Society, and I love the lessons and whatnot, but I think that Primary will be a great source of blessings.

Firstly, I was in a similar calling a few years back (only I believe I was the second counselor in the Primary presidency in the branch then, and the music was a part of my duties), and that was a bad time in my life. I was off doing my own thing and I wasn't dependable or responsible. I rarely showed up for church and I let the rest of the presidency down. Made it harder on them. I don't remember everything, but I think part of it had to do with me not wanting to do the work to plan music time and also a lesson for sharing time every so often. So I just...didn't go. And I felt bad for doing it, so I was depressed and felt unworthy to go to church, and it just became a cycle of unhappiness all around. I feel like this is a chance for me to repent of that and move forward. Forgive myself. Know that I have come a long way since then. I've always kind of felt guilty in relation to Primary in general since then, and I think this will help me finally release all that pent-up misery I have.
That reminds me, I also need to apologize to the person who was Primary president back then. I'm sure I can find a way to get a hold of the person who was first counselor, too. I think that's part of why I haven't been able to move on. I think they've both forgiven me already, but I never said sorry.

Another reason I'm excited is that I get to work with kids and this is another opportunity I have to pick up teaching skills for when I'm a parent someday. A lot of the kids are hyperactive and kinda crazy, so this will help me further hone my patience. Which I'll be grateful for; I could use the practice. XD

Finally, I think this goes along with wanting to work through the Personal Progress manual for Young Women. It represents a sort of back to basics thing. Line upon line, precept on precept; the best way for me to strengthen my faith and gain an unshakable testimony of the gospel is to work on the principles first. You must have a foundation before you can build upon it. I will be there with the kids and hear the things they are being taught. I can look for the lessons in the songs I teach and strengthen my testimony that way.

So I am looking forward to this. It may not be easy, who knows, and maybe I'll feel like procrastinating a bunch, but I know that the Lord will bless me as I serve in this calling and that I have a wonderful opportunity to make a positive impression in the lives of these young children.